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Thursday, June 4, 2009

Are you serious?

Ok, I don't normally blast authors of fanfiction, at least not on my blog, but I felt that in order for the proper venting to take place this must be done. 

Are you serious? A Jane Austen fanfiction story written for modern day about Darcy and Elizabeth sounds ok, am I right? Well, it is written for high schoolers, that much is certain, and the author has Darcy as the big man on campus and Elizabeth as the smart @$$, jerky girl who is a year younger. Bingley makes a bet with Darcy that he can't make Lizzy go out with him for 6 months and then dump her. Darcy takes the bet and begins to woo her...alas it doesn't work because of Lizzy's severe cynical nature, she thwarts his every move. On New Year's Eve, the tables turn and Lizzy and Will kiss as 2007 comes to a close and 2008 is a new beginning...I know right...cheesetastic. 

Anyway, they start dating and everything is going smoothly until Fitzie (Colonel Fitzwilliam), Darcy's younger cousin at 16, finds out about the bet and tells Lizzy, who in turn breaks up with Darcy without first listening to him explain that he has previously called off the bet after prom. She doesn't believe him and storms out. At graduation, they reunite and she smiles... that should be the end right? Something that leaves you thinking that they will be together or something... 

Well guess what... nope. The author scoots the story forward ten years and reveals that everyone except Darcy and Lizzy are together, they apparently broke up before Darcy left for Brown University. Darcy is engaged to another woman, who is a complete jerk, and Lizzy spends her time as a journalist and watches Fitzie's son, Ashton.  They meet again after Ashton is born and Darcy is once again drawn to Lizzy...he even begins lying to his fiance to fly to Chicago to spend time with Lizzy. He ends up breaking up with his fiance and goes after Lizzy, who thinks he has chosen the other woman...getting to the good part, right? Nope. They end up in a car accident and Lizzy DIES. Yeah, you heard me right. She dies. And Will can't stand that so he commits suicide and he dreams of limbo with Lizzy and goes to die with her... 

WHaaaaa???? Too much drama... way too much. Frankly it was dumb. Yes, dumb. That is all. 

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